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fear of failure

9 Deadly Fears Stopping You From Being Your Best Self

Truth is, everyone has fears! Even that millionaire you look up to, or that spiritual monk that seems so ego-less, however the truth is people who achieve great things in life (each person defines greatness in their own way), have the courage, and inner wisdom to know how to deal with fear. One of the easiest ways, is to first recognie the fear that's literally physically and mentally stopping you.

Here is a list of 10 of the most common fears that stop people from success. Try to find ones that you innately feel like you have, recognize it, ponder on it,  identify where it came from, and learn to disassociate yourself from it. Understand that your mind thinks these fears are protecting you, when in actuality they're holding you back. Most importantly, be aware of these fears so that when they do creep up, you can decide to act out of courage, which is acting in spite of the negative ego-driven feelings.


1) The Fear of Failure (Being Wrong, Or Not Being Good Enough)

This is easily the most common fear people have towards success. Humans have large imaginations, we're able to picture things that do not even exist. As much as this can serve us (by picturing the lifestyle we want, and visualizing solutions to problems), the imagination can get the worst of us. Almost all people that want to venture off into their life's purpose, imagine the worst case scenario, which 99.9% of the time WON'T happen, when's the last time you heard of a story of a person who decided to try going for what made them truly happy (given they're not delusional but take practical steps), and ended up completely homeless, or failed so miserably that they didn't ever want to show there face again... It doesn't happen, the word failure has a negative connotation but in reality, is actually just life's way of teaching us what not to do so we can learn what does work. Instead of fearing failure, embrace it. When you learned to walk, did you get it in the first try? Didn't think so, you failed, and failed, and failed, until you finally succeeded.


2) The Fear of Success (Standing Out & Stepping Away From The Crowd)

The fear of success is a unique one which many have, but do not understand, or even know they have. The fear of success is basically when the discomfort of being #1, or being your best self is enough to keep you from getting to the top. Here's an example, maybe you're a college student that's comfortable getting B's you've always gotten B's, but getting an A is a lot to live up to, it's a just a little extra work and you know you're capable of it, but you've never seen yourself as an "A" student, in fact, when you think about it, it feels quite discomforting. This is the fear of success. The fear of success has a positive side to it, it means you know you're able to be more successful, but the feelings associated with that level of achievement are keeping you from getting there. The trick with this, is to get comfortable winning, be more comfortable being at number 1, and being the best at everything you do, than not. Take a look at Floyd Mayweather, he's so comfortable winning that anything less feels uncomfortable, his mind is just set to win.


3) The Fear of Being Judged (Caring What Others Think)

The fear of being judged is simply when you are scared to put forth your ideas, your unique creations, because of what you think others would think. There's a simple trick to this, first of all, you must stop caring what others think in general, and second of all, most people are too busy caring about how they think that they aren't focused on you. If you've never been given permission before, GO DO WHAT YOU WANT, and let the people worry about themselves. If someone does judge you, or your idea, understand it's from their own fear mentality, that they're scared to do/be/have what you want to do/be/have.


4) The Fear of Being Vulnerable (Being Hurt)

If you have the fear of being vulnerable, it means 2 things, you're hiding your emotions, and you're misinterpreting what high self-esteem means. High self-esteem is NOT stifling your feelings, however it is allowing yourself to feel the way you want, expressing it, not apologizing for it, and mustering up the courage to get over the negative feelings. High self-esteem is being in control of your feelings, not hiding your feelings. Being vulnerable is needed if you want to find love, find your passion, be enthusiastic, influence people, inspire others, gain a good group of friends, and much more. hence, why vulnerability is not a bad thing as long as you have high self-esteem to go with it.


5) The Fear of Rejection

The fear of rejection is similar to vulnerability, in the sense that the only reason one would fear rejection is because they don't want to be hurt. However, the fear of rejection stems from not being accepted from a person or group. You may have heard this before, so we'll keep it short, but in simple, rejection should never be taken personally, whether you're trying to approach that pretty girl, don't land that job after the interview, can't get funding to start your business because investors don't believe in your idea, whatever it is, it's not to be taken personally, it has literally nothing to do with you as a person. Often it could be the person having a bad day, you having a bad day, the energy not being right, them rejecting a thing (like an idea) and not you, and countless other variables. Rejection, like failure is a learning tool. Walt Disney was rejected numerous times before he was able to fund his business.


6) The Fear of Wasting Time (Missing Out, Or Always Chasing)

Some people for some reason, feel like if they decide to go for their dreams, or try something new that they believe they would love, they might end up "missing out" on what everyone else is doing. This fear stems from the belief that success is something to "attain" something that's outside of ourselves, and something that's in the future. It basically means that I'm going to have to sacrifice a lot of my time to get something in the future, and therefore I won't be able to have fun like everyone else for a while. The truth is, which is reiterated throughout FeelingSuccess over, and over, and over, and over again, that if you don't love what you're doing, you're on the wrong path and this is also the solution to getting over this fear. Think about this, if you love writing, why would you feel like you're missing out, if there actually wasn't something else you'd be doing? Sure, ego does kick in and now with all the social media outlets we tend to compare ourselves as to who's enjoying life more which gives us ulterior motives to do things we think may bring us more happiness, but if you truly love what you're doing, it doesn't really matter what "else" you could be doing, nor does it matter how long it would take to get to where you want to be. If you did what you believed has purpose, and enjoyed doing, and found a way to support yourself doing so, then that in itself is one hell of a life, you're actually utilizing your time, not wasting it.


7) The Fear of Responsibility

Who enjoys taking on more responsibility? No-one, but guess what, the people who live the must fulfilling lives, understand the major benefits of taking on more responsibility, and if you want to achieve any sort of greatness, you need to realize this too. Richard Branson, founder of Virgin Group, has 400 businesses under its name, he loves what he does, but I can bet he doesn't "love" the responsibility that comes with it yet he understands its needed and doesn't allow it to hold him back. Some of the perks that come with a person who can handle a lot of responsibility include being seen as a leader, gaining major wisdom, being a man of value, and therefore being someone people want to know which opens more opportunity.


8) The Fear of Loneliness (When Going Your Own Way)

The fear of loneliness comes from the belief that if you decide to venture off into your own path, and not focus your attention on finding/staying with a "crew," or a"lover," you will forever be alone. We have seen this happen time and time again, the people who don't venture off to find their selves in this world, sadly, often don't find the crew or lover they're truly looking for. In fact, how can someone love you, and how can you find where you belong, if you don't know yourself well enough? More often then not, when you venture off into doing what you want and what resonates with your heart in all areas of your life, you will run into the right people, if you don't however, you may never meet the people you were meant to meet.


9) The Fear of Being Different

Guess what? Everyone is different! Only few actually have the confidence to express it. This fear ties in with being lonely, and the fear of success, and comes with the belief that people won't like you if you stand out. Once again, if you don't express your uniquness, how do you expect to find a crew that likes you for who you are, and how do you expect someone to love you for who you are? It doesn't make sense. Not only that, but understand that achieving financial wealth allows one to express themselves more, and if you're scared to express yourself now, making more money, or following your passion without getting over this fear will just be self-sabotaging. Being different is good, being weird is interesting, and if you fear people won't like it, please read number 3, the fear of being judged again.

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